Meds

The GP put me on pain meds yesterday, because I'm coddling my neck for the pain, and he says to start getting better I need to start holding it up properly and using it normally. The pain causes me to hold my head down chin tucked towards my chest. If I don't hold it this way I get the constant headaches, severe pain in my left ear and eye..eventually making it unbearable and having to go to bed for a nap. My shoulder on that side also has pain, which gets worse if I'm laying down...so the nap then inflames that. The pills work quite fast on me, as I do not like medication and don't take it if it can be avoided, for how sick pills tend to make me. These pills make me feel drunk, then tired, rendering me pretty useless until they wear off. Oh I really can't wait for these physical symptoms to die down, they are impeding me getting anything done, and my schedule for doing this house up has been thrown to the winds for now. :( I can't sleep longer than 30 mins to an hour max in a stretch for all the nightmares I am having, and this means in my woke state I am quite a grumpy cow. I'm so edgy and jumpy now, the slightest sound sending me diving for cover, how absolutely insane is that! When we went out to get to the GP I was so upset and fearful about every single car we encountered along the way, like seriously I know how daft it sounds...but it's reality for me...being forced to even be in a car causes me to go into a state of detachment as if I'm watching myself getting taken to wherever from the outside looking in, I think I'm losing my mind over this, and I just don't understand why. When we were done at the doctors, just knowing I had to get back into a car makes me instantly panicked and start fearing and stressing. Oh how lovely it is to just be home and not be forced out into a car.